The Zodiac Signs As Dreams I've Had


I go on a long journey with many people across many challenges, crossing bridges over troubled water, going through many tunnels, to find a castle made entirely of ivory hidden in a cave. But if we haven't enjoyed the journey, the ivory turns to molten lava. Since one teen had been complaining the whole time, we watch the ivory towers melt.
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Everyone is slowly becoming infected with a parasite. People love the parasites because they cause the appearance of health. People feel great once infected. I keep trying to explain to people that the parasites increase health and impair judgement in order to more effectively spread. No one listens. They begin vaccinating children with the parasite. I crash a vaccination clinic and take a vial of the parasite. I show the vial to my mom and tell her we can find a cure. She smashes the vial. She is also infected.


The class is on a trip to the aquarium but due to an error of scheduling must stay overnight in a hotel. I am unprepared, as I have not packed a change of clothes. The class goes to see a production of Hamlet. In this interpretation Hamlet is only courting Ophelia out of obligation and is actually in love with Guildenstern. All the dialogue is the same but during their repartee they have sex. The teacher we are with is not pleased with this interpretation.


Along with a packet on the Supreme Court we are also expected to turn in one of our fingers as homework. The teacher passes around pairs of shears for us to cut them off with. I am trying, but my finger is sturdier than it looks. I realize while trying to cut off my finger and failing that this is an unreasonable request on the teacher’s part. Turns out it was just a test to see if we would cut off our fingers. Only one girl actually managed to do it. She seems a little pissed.


I am spider man. I’m chilling in costume with MJ and Eddie Brock. Our art teacher comes by and sits with us and I consider running because I can't be caught as Spiderman by adults, but then I remember art teachers are always cool. Another teacher walks by and I don't react right away because I feel so safe with these people. Art teacher tells me to run. It's a gym teacher, who are never cool. This particular teacher has it out for me, wants to unmask me and turn me into the police. I don't evade him as well as I usually do.


I see a bunny in the front yard. Aww, cute. As it hops away I see another shape, think it is another bunny. I get closer, it is a chickcharney. I am scared by the unfamiliarity and run from it, but end up leading it in to the backyard. I run but I pass through spider webs. They get bigger and bigger until I get caught in one. I think, no, the black widows will come.


I'm trying to shower with my headphones on. Showering is important. I accidentally throw my headphones out a window and they land in the neighbor's backyard. Raye is friends with the girl who lives there and gets them back for me. They look more like a hair straightener now. I go to Girl Scout meeting. This is the last one. I am aware that I have not been to any up to this point.


Someone gives me a puppy for free but I forget about it and leave it in the car. It dies. Then it turns out to still be alive so I give it some old stale power bar that I also left in the car and some water left over from the gym. I forget it's there again and hit it with the car door, killing it for real. I cry.


I'm in a grocery store considering buying pop tarts in bulk. There is a couple in the park fighting. They are a hippo and an elephant? Giant, purple and green respectively. They have a little blue daughter but I'm not sure what animal she is. She wants to go home, but it's too far a walk. She leaves, and Sherlock Holmes is hired to find her. We all help. In our search we come across bathrooms and me and mom look in the ladies. She's hiding in there, with handfuls of costume jewelry. We help her escape, mom takes the jewelry and hides it in her purse. We go outside and Sherlock asks us if she was in there and we say no.


I am me again walking through the desert with my mom. I am on her back sometimes. As we walk through the desert we are pursued by two men, one older than the other and possibly a butler. They can both turn into dinosaurs


I peruse some fair-like stand on the beach and learn about a creature whose name I can no longer pronounce now that I'm awake. It is a small baby bear with a flat nose that hatches out of a large egg buried in the sand. People often make the mistake of finding these fascinated eggs, taking them home, then bonding with the bear once they hatch. The bear is still a bear though, so once it grows up it attacks the person who raised it. Of course, Mike finds an egg and tries to raise the baby bear-thing. I fall for its adorable charms.


I am Spiderman. He/me is tired of being thought of as a dweeb. Inspired by the pride of the X-Men who are openly mutants and have no secret identities, I decide to lose the mask and just go by Peter. I still wear the costume, but no mask, just sunglasses to protect from dust as I swing. Some people call me Spiderpeter.

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LEO      |   VIRGO     |    LIBRA     |   SCORPIO 

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